Mommy Tribe: Ways to Connect with New Moms in Your Neighborhood

Let’s face it, motherhood can be a lonely and isolating endeavor at times. Your old friend group seemed to slowly vanish once you became pregnant, and those who did stick around simply can’t relate to your new mom struggles.

It’s an all-too familiar problem for many first-time moms who are embarking on their newfound journey into motherhood. If you’re feeling lost and alone, it’s time for you to get out of the house and find a mommy tribe who can relate to the unique challenges you now face as a new mom.

Right now, there are probably dozens of other new moms in your neighborhood facing the same dilemma. Why not reach out to them and form your own tribe? Here are a few ways you can find and connect with other new moms in your area:

1.      Use technology.

With so many friendship apps and online groups, there are now plenty of ways for moms to connect online and meet up in person. For example, one of the newest friendship apps called Peanut is dedicated to helping new moms meet and has been described as “Tinder for Moms.”

You can also find moms in your neighborhood by joining Meetup, Nextdoor or Facebook and by posting in their new mom groups. Facebook in particular has many parenting-specific groups with parents who are eager to share where they bought their organic baby clothes or how to fix frustrating breast pumping problems.

Just be sure to do your research before blindly joining a group. The last thing you want is to join a mommy group that has the complete opposite parenting philosophy as you.

2.      Enroll in mommy-and-me classes.

Starting to feel like a hostage in your own home? Try signing up for mommy-and-me classes. Taking mom and baby yoga classes or swim lessons with your little one not only gets you out of the house, it’s also a great way to meet other new moms in your area.

If fitness with baby isn’t your thing, it’s not your only option. There are also classes and workshops that focus on teaching specific parenting techniques such as positive discipline or stress reduction for new moms. Find one that best suits your interests and don’t be afraid to introduce yourself to other moms in your group.

3.      Find a shared struggle.

One of the most tried-and-true ways to connect to someone is by going through a similar hardship. Whether you’re having a difficult time with breastfeeding, struggling with the baby blues or trying to cope with being a single mom, there is another new mother who is going through the same thing as you.

To find moms with similar struggles, you can always search Meetup and Facebook groups dedicated to specific topics. If you can’t find a group, why not start one yourself? If it’s a common struggle, other moms will likely be grateful to finally have a support group to help them.

4.      Consider joining a MOPS group.

Mothers of Preschoolers, or MOPS, is an organization dedicated to gathering and supporting moms in their own neighborhoods. There are all sorts of different MOPS groups that meet at coffee shops, churches, parks, living rooms or even through video chat.

Although it’s $31.95 to join a group, some groups might charge additional fees. However, it could be worth the cost when you consider that many MOPS groups offer childcare so that you can meet and connect with other moms. Plus, there is often food, drink and the occasional speaker to help you navigate the new mom life.

5.      Be consistent.

If you realize that a certain class or mommy meetup group isn’t for you, it’s perfectly acceptable to back out. However, once you do manage to find a group that you enjoy, try your best to show up to events consistently.

As a new mom, it can be difficult to stick to plans when you have a never-ending list of things to do at home. But being consistent is key to making new mom friends. If you need your partner to help around the house for you to make a mommy group event, don’t hesitate to ask!

6.      Put yourself out there.

As daunting as it may sound, you need to work up the courage to make the first move with other new moms. Otherwise, you’ll likely just end up staring longingly at them from across the playground for months on end.

If you’ve always been a shy person, it’s incredibly difficult to put yourself out there. How do you make the first move? You could always try complimenting them on their little one’s adorable baby outfit or how nicely their toddler plays with yours. This will help break the ice, giving you the chance to naturally introduce yourself.

7.      Be prepared for trial and error.

If you put yourself out there, chances are good that you’ll meet a lot of new moms with distinct personalities and with different parenting philosophies. Although you’re all connected through a shared experience, this doesn’t mean that you’ll hit it off with each new mom you meet.

Some mom friendships will turn into lasting relationships, while others are great for a quick playdate and nothing more. Don’t force a relationship that is too difficult to maintain. You’ve got enough on your plate with a new baby!

8.   Keep judgments to yourself.

You click perfectly with a new mom you met in baby yoga class. The only problem? She doesn’t stop shaming you for every parenting decision you make that’s even slightly different from hers.

This is a common problem with new and experienced parents alike. If you want to make and keep new mom friends, you need to leave all the negative comments and opinions at the door.

Just because your new acquaintance has a different parenting style than you doesn’t necessarily mean that it’s wrong. Everyone is trying to figure things out one day at a time. Be accepting of their own unique journey and just do you.

Finding Your Tribe

With these strategies, you can finally start growing your mommy tribe and getting more of that adult interaction you desperately need as a new mom. Just remember to smile at newcomers and make room for them at your table—they were once in your shoes!